You’ve seen the commercials. Those late night spots pitching crazy products on some random cable channel. You can always count on them hawking some sort of amazing adhesive. They usually involve some scientific breakthrough involving space age polymers.
These days the “as seen on TV” stickum of choice is Flex Glue. According to ad, put down those nails, screws, and welder’s torch,my friend. Buy a tube of this goo and you won’t need mortar to build with bricks.
Forget Flex Glue
Did you know there’s a glue that makes all of these look like preschool paste? Jesus describes it in a discussion about divorce (Mk 10:1-12). When a group of religious rule keepers come to Christ asking for the secret to tearing things apart, He says they’re missing the point. He wants us to marvel at God’s supernatural Super Glue.
Forget Flex Glue, Gorilla Glue, Liquid Nails, Loctite, rubber cement, two-part epoxy, and even duct tape. There’s absolutely nothing in the universe that sticks and holds like the divine bond of marriage.
NOT That Kind of Christ
This all goes down at a key moment in Mark’s bio of Jesus. Up to this point, most of the second Gospel has focused on the true identity of the miracle working Rabbi/Carpenter from Nazareth.
After a ton of speculation, He finally confirms that He is indeed the Christ, the long awaited Hero from heaven (Mk 8:29-31; 9:7, 31). But there’s just one little catch. Jesus is NOT the kind of Messiah folks are expecting.
Long before Jesus rules triumphantly, He’ll be double crossed and denounced. He’ll be tortured and killed. But get this. After three days, He’ll come strolling out of the cemetery after punching death in the throat!
Leaving Galilee
So far, a huge chunk of Mark’s story of Jesus takes place in Galilee, an out-of-the-way corner in the backwater boondocks of the Roman Empire called Palestine. That location changes as we flip the page to chapter ten.
“Then Jesus left Capernaum and went down to the region of Judea and into the area east of the Jordan River. Once again crowds gathered around Him, and as usual He was teaching them” (v1).
A Change of Real Estate
From Galilee, Christ and His crew head south and east, crossing the Jordan River into what we know today as nation of Jordan. Back in the First Century, folks called this little sliver of land Perea.
Dead God-Man Walking
This change of real estate is a big deal in the life of our Savior. He’s now on the road to Jerusalem (Mk 10:17, 32, Mk 11:1; Lk 9:51). He’s been there before. But this time, it’s different.
The Messiah is on a mission. He has a date with death. He’s marching to own His crucifixion. He’s a dead God-Man walking. But we’ll get to that later.
A People Magnet
Here on eastern bank of the Jordan River, the Lord makes His last stop before heading to the big city. When He does, the crowds gather…again. He teaches them…again. If you’re familiar with His story, it’s the regular rhythm of Jesus’ ministry.
The Son of God is a people magnet. Folks want to be near Him. He leverages that popularity to teach them. Matthew describes the very same scene (Mt 19:1-9) and adds that He also heals many of them as well (Mt 19:2).
Here Come the Pharisees
Things seem to be hunky dory but that’s about to change. “Some Pharisees came and tried to trap Him with this question” (v2). Here we go again. It’s not the first time these religious know-it-alls have been a problem (Mk 2:16, 28; 3:2-6; 7:1-13; 8:11-13). It won’t be the last (Mk 12:13-17). Give them credit. These guys are nothing if not persistent.
Just who are the Pharisees? Glad you asked. The perspective of history has given them a nasty rep. In first century Israel, the Pharisees are Jewish superstars known for their over-the-top devotion to God.
The Separate Ones
Believe it or not, they’re NOT religious pros. The Pharisees are mostly middle class businessmen who have a fanatical commitment to the letter of God’s law expressed in what we now call they Old Testament.
How dedicated are they? Well, their name actually means “the separate ones,” as in separate from dirt and scum of those who didn’t take their Jewish faith seriously enough.
All about Image
Not only do the Pharisees arrogantly see themselves as a cut above the rest of society, they’re way more worried about their external than the internal. They’re all about image.
There’s just one little problem. God looks at the heart. That’s why Jesus says, “Everything they do is for show” (Mt 23:5) and calls them out as “hypocrites” (Mt 23:13, 15, 23, 25, 29).
The Pharisees also see it as their job to be the religious police and call everybody out when they don’t measure up. That’s why the Lord slaps these bullies with labels like “blind guides” (Mt 23:16, 24), “blind fools” (Mt 23:17), “whitewashed tombs” (Mt 23:27), and “snakes” (Mt 23:33).
Setting the Trap
So it’s no surprise that the Pharisees have had their fill of this Galilean troublemaker. They try to ambush Him and embarrass Him publicly. Mark describes how they attempt to set our Savior up.
The author uses a word we translate as “trap” (Gr. πειραζω/peirazo) that can simply be used to describe testing something or someone in order to ascertain quality. But in a negative sense, it means to tempt or scheme maliciously in order bring out the worst and discredit somebody.
The Trapper
So it may come as no shock that this word is the basis for one of Satan’s nicknames. The tempter (Mt 4:3; 1Th 3:5). Our enemy constantly seeks to entice and take down anything associated with Jesus. The trapper is out to steal, kill, and destroy (Jn 10:10).
In what could be a scene out of “House of Cards,” the Pharisees set a trap for Jesus. But here’s the deal. You can’t set a trap for God. You’ll end up being the one in the trap! Wile E. Coyote with his truckload of products from Acme stands a better chance of taking down the Roadrunner.
Sniffing Glue
If you think you’re going to pull a fast one on the Son of God, you’re fooling yourself. You’re making a huge mistake. We need to realize that we’re not going to snooker our Savior. If we don’t, we’re just like the Pharisees. We must be sniffing glue.
Baiting the Trap
They bait the trap with the subject of divorce. They ask Jesus, “Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife?” (v2). It’s one of the hot button issues of the time. Hmm, some things never change.
Folks in Jesus’ day fall in line with two big-time rabbis on ending a marriage. Team Hillel believes divorce is no big deal and you can get one anytime you want. Rabbi Shammai and his followers say the Big D is the nuclear option only in cases where one spouse has been sleeping around.
Pulling the Pin
The Pharisees figure no matter which position the Nazarene takes, they’ve got Him. He’ll self-destruct. So they pull the pin on the First Century hand grenade of divorce and toss it to Jesus. Can’t you just see the smirk on their faces?
The term here in the original language for “divorce” is απολυω/apoluo. It’s actually a compound word meaning to untangle and rip apart. If you think that sounds messy, it is. It's never neat and clean…especially when you’re talking about a marriage and family.
Looking for Loopholes
A couple of thousand years later, we’re still asking the same questions. Still looking for loopholes in all the wrong places. Yeah, yeah, divorce may not be the first best choice. But let’s be real. Everybody’s doing it. (Who doesn’t hear their mom’s voice at this point asking her rhetorical question about everybody else jumping off a cliff?)
Answering a Question with a Question
Instead of taking the bait, Christ counters. “Jesus answered them with a question” (v3). No surprise, really. It’s one of His favorite ways of stirring the pot in a discussion. By one count, He does it a grand total of 29 times in the Gospels.
And in doing so, the Lord turns the tables on the Pharisees. He tosses the sticky ticking time bomb back in their laps. Here guys, catch! When He does, I wonder if He gives His disciples a sly wink.
What Does Our Heavenly Dad Say?
He asks these Bible experts a question straight from the OT (then again the OT is the Bible they’ve got at this point!). “What did Moses say in the law about divorce?” (v3).
Notice how Christ redefines the debate. This isn’t about some rabbi’s opinion on the issue. The most important thing is how God defines divorce in His Word. In other words, it’s not what you can get away with. It’s what God has commanded.
What a powerful reminder for the followers of Jesus to stop slinging our personal opinions around like an uncontrolled firehose. Instead, why don’t we see what our loving Heavenly Dad has to say?
Digging Their Own Grave
The Pharisees respond, “Well, he permitted it” (v4). These so-called religious experts see divorce as a supernatural permission slip. This is their way of saying, “Hey, the Big Mo said so!”
They go on to say, “He said a man can give his wife a written notice of divorce and send her away” (v4). They attempt to build their case. Little do they realize they’re really digging their own grave. They’ll discover that soon enough.
Locked and Loaded
In the meantime, the Pharisees are locked and loaded. They know exactly the passage Jesus is talking about. In in the final installment of what we call the Pentateuch or the Book in Five Parts, God gives Moses His guidelines concerning divorce. It goes a little something like this…
“Suppose a man marries a woman but she does not please him. Having discovered something wrong with her, he writes a document of divorce, hands it to her, and sends her away from his house. When she leaves the house, she is free to marry another man.
“But if the second husband also turns against her, writes a document of divorce, hands it to her, and sends her away, or if he dies, the first husband may not marry her again, for she has been defiled. That would be detestable to the LORD” (Dt 24:1-4).
Reluctant Restrictions
According to John MacArthur, this passage in Deuteronomy doesn’t command, commend, condone, or even suggest divorce. It reluctantly recognizes that divorce occurs and allows it for very restricted reasons.
God isn’t giving husbands a get-out-of-marriage-free card. Instead He’s actually protecting the rights and reputation of the wife. This keeps her first husband from treating her as a piece of property or a used car.
The Cesspool Inside Us
Jesus then reminds the Pharisees why Moses included this in the law in the first place. “He wrote this commandment only as a concession to your hard hearts” (v5).The only reason the God had Big Mo include this loophole is because of the cesspool inside us.
The Pharisees have totally missed God’s point. Divorce is the last resort. One of those “in case of emergency break glass” sorta deals. They misunderstand God’s reluctant provision of divorce for His endorsement of it.
Hard Hearts
Let’s do a little digging into the original language, if you don’t mind. “Hard hearts” (Gr. σκληροκαρδια/sklerokardia) is actually a compound word meaning hard/harsh/rough/violent/rough/intolerable (Gr. σκληρο-/sklero-) and heart (Gr. -καρδια/-kardia). in this case, it’s referring to the seat of your spiritual life.
This is Jesus’ way of directly connecting the cruel and uncaring treatment of their wives with a lack of any real connection with their Creator. We end up treating our spouse harshly whenever our relationship with God has dried up.
A Husband’s Prayer Life
So it’s no surprise when Peter, one of the disciples we know to be married (Mk 1:30), connects how a husband treats his wife with the guy’s prayer life. “Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered” (1Pet 3:7). Something to keep in mind, gents.
Hans Bayer wants us to know this does NOT mean only hard-hearted people would ever push for divorce. Jesus’ point is that it’s because of the rebellion in our hard hearts that our marriages struggle. God provides divorce for those couples whose sin irretrievably damages their relationship.
The First Option
Don’t make the mistake of thinking God REQUIRES divorce in cases of sexual immorality. He only PERMITS it. This is a fundamental difference from First Century Judaism, which actually REQUIRED divorce in cases of adultery.
For the followers of Jesus, the first option is ALWAYS forgiveness and reconciliation. He calls us to forgive in the same way God forgives us through Christ (Eph 4:32). Only when that becomes a dead end is divorce a consideration.
Let’s not blow past the fact that forgiving a spouse for certain sins, especially unfaithfulness, is next to impossible. But I read somewhere that anything is possible when God is involved (Mt 19:26). It’s not easy but forgiveness should ALWAYS be the first option.
Fire up the Flux Capacitor
Instead of looking for reasons to end a marriage, our Savior wants us to understand the supernatural strength of the connection God gives to each marriage. And to do so, Jesus flips back to the opening pages of Genesis.
Forget what God said through Moses. Christ wants us to rewind way back to the very beginning. “But ‘God made them male and female’ from the beginning of creation” (v6). Fire up the Flux Capacitor for…um, let me see…the beginning of time!
God’s Ethical Ideal
Wanna know how marriage is supposed to work? Let’s see what God says about it when He invented it (Gen 1:27). I know a lot of people think the creation story of Adam and Even in the Garden of Eden is a fairy tale. Clearly Jesus doesn’t.
Instead of ripping couples apart, the Lord discusses God’s divine glue that holds them together. Instead of a deeper discussion of divorce, He talks about God’s ethical ideal.
Adam Busts out in Song
The process begins with God creating a man and woman each in His image. Something supernatural happens when a couple comes together. We see that when we hit “play” on first parents’ wedding video.
When God the Father walks the bride down the aisle and presents Eve to her husband, the writer of Genesis says Adam busts out in song. “This one is bone from my bone and flesh from my flesh! She will be called ‘woman,’ because she was taken from ‘man’” (Gen 2:23).
An Amazing Union
With the last chord of the groom’s tune still ringing in the garden, God describes the amazing union that occurs not just in the first marriage, but all marriages. “This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife” (v7; Gen 2:24).
We find the key idea here in the term the NLT translates as “joined” (Gr. προσκολλαω/proskollao). It comes from a root word meaning glue. God is at work in the husband and wife creating a deeply personal connection between them. He does it through His supernatural Super Glue.
When God Ties Our Knot
This is exactly what Solomon is talking about in Ecclesiastes. He says it’s great when a couple snuggles close together in bed but there’s something even better. “Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken” (Ecc 4:12). Because God is the one who actually ties our knot, it’s supernaturally strong!
God’s Marriage Math
Jesus says something miraculous happens as a result. “And the two are united into one” (v8; Gen 2:24). It’s God’s Marriage Math: 1+1=ONE! When it comes to our Creator’s original intention, there’s addition but no subtraction or division. There’s no reason to tear the marriage apart.
Everything changes for a husband and wife once our God glues them together. The bond He creates is so strong that we give up our individuality when we marry. It’s so much more than wanting the best for our spouse. Our marriage is now the top priority.
Team Marriage
“They are no longer two but one” (v8). Like in sports, it’s all about the team. Not Team Husband. Not Team Wife. It’s now Team Marriage. The “Bible-y” way of saying it is dying to self. As the old saying goes, “There’s no ‘I’ in ‘team.’” It’s all about “us.”
Jesus wants us to know that God’s supernatural Super Glue creates a grip to tight that it is actually stronger than anything else in the relationship. There’s no tearing them apart without doing all sorts of damage.
Sacred Cement
The Messiah doesn’t want us to miss the divine math of marriage so He hits it one more time. “They are no longer two but one” (v8). The focus of the Pharisees may be about how to sever a couple. The Lord is looking at the sacred cement which fuses two into one.
God is about bringing people together, not splitting them apart. Ripping apart a couple that has become one flesh is brutal and messy. It’s emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually gory!
Breaking the Heart of Our Heavenly Dad
That’s why He absolutely hates divorce (Mal 2:16). The heart of our Heavenly Dad breaks over the devastation it causes to everyone involved. Husband. Wife. Children. Family. Friends.
But please hear me. There is abundant grace and forgiveness if that’s you. There’s supernatural healing for your wounds. Divorce may be brutal but it’s not unforgivable. Let the love of Jesus wash over you.
Connecting the Biblical Dots
You may love our Savior but wonder what He knows about marriage. I mean, He spends His entire earthly life single. Well, get this. The Apostle Paul connects the biblical dots from these very same verses in Genesis with Jesus and His bride.
Jesus and His Bride
“As the Scriptures say, ‘A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one” (Eph 5:31-32).
Think of it this way. Who knows more about marriage than God? He invented it. The connection a husband and wife have is a picture of His own connection to His bride. So yeah, nobody knows marriage better than Jesus.
Here Comes the King!
That’s the reason Christ goes on to warn us, “Let no one split apart what God has joined together” (v9). In doing so, He compares how a married couple now can work together like a team of powerful draft animals.
“Joined together” is the Greek verb συζευγνυμι/suzeugnumi, which paints a picture of uniting (especially in marriage) like a team of horses, mules, or oxen in order pull a heavy load. Picture those eight Clydesdales proudly strutting in front of the beer wagon.
But this is no TV commercial for the King of Beers. It’s to bring glory to the King of Kings. And because He hitches the husband and wife together, Jesus says we make a big mistake anytime we split them up.
The Divinely Ordained Dynamic Duo
Did you notice the “what” in Jesus’ statement? Read it again. “Let no one split apart WHAT God has joined together” (v9 emphasis added). The “what” is marriage. Not the “who” of the husband and wife.
You see, God didn’t just create men and women in His image. He teams them together supernaturally. Don’t break up His divinely ordained Dynamic Duo. This includes the two members of the team!
Setting a Terrible Example
Let’s face facts. As God’s people, we have done a terrible job of setting the example in marriage. Shouldn’t the followers of Jesus treat marriage with greater respect and care than society? Well, we haven’t.
And we wonder why culture ignores us when it comes to all our lip flapping about the “sanctity of marriage” and other moral issues. Let’s face facts. We’ve jumped off the moral high ground that God has given us on the issue like cliff divers in Acapulco.
Don’t go pointing fingers. Stop the name calling. Take a long look in the mirror, folks. We did this too ourselves. Sadly, we’ve gotten really good at ripping apart marriages that God glued together. And we’ve been doing it since the time of Moses.
Reviewing the Game Film
Jesus artfully dodges the Pharisees’ trap. But His disciples want to know more. “Later, when He was alone with His disciples in the house, they brought up the subject again” (v10).
It’s not the only time in Mark’s Gospel where we see Him break it down with the boys like a coach reviewing game film (Mk 4:10; 9:33). Who do you have in your life that’s willing to go deeper with on the sticky issues of life?
The Devastation of Divorce
The Lord shifts the discussion from the strength of God’s supernatural Super Glue to the devastation of divorce. “Whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery against her. And if a woman divorces her husband and marries someone else, she commits adultery” (v11-12).
Over in Matthew’s version of this very same conversation, the author includes the phrase “unless his wife has been unfaithful” (Mt 19:9). Maybe Mark doesn’t include it because Christ has made it a major point in His most famous sermon (Mt 5:37).
Reserved for Husband and Wife
The term in the original language for the act of adultery here is μοιχαω/moichaο. At the most basic level, it describes when a married person jumps in the sack with someone other than their spouse. God has reserved that just for a husband and wife.
Let’s cut to the chase here. Sexual intimacy is way more than just which body parts are involved. If you’re married, you have no business doing anything that draws you close to someone of the opposite sex who’s not your spouse.
A Slippery Slope
Emotional intimacy with anyone of the opposite sex other than your marriage partner is isn’t just a slippery slope. It’s sin. Plain and simple.
So, guys, don’t share struggles with your wife with lady in the cubicle next to you. And stop fooling yourself, ladies. Don’t buy the lie that the cute guy you met “gets you” way more than your knucklehead husband.
Cheating on God
It should come as no surprise that μοιχαω/moichaο comes from a root word that simply means unfaithfulness. Not just to your husband or wife but in your relationship with God.
That’s why God compares replacing Him as the object of our worship with something else as spiritual adultery (Is 1:21; Jer 3:6-9; Ezek 16:30-40; 23:3-10, Rev 2:20-22). When we do, we cheat on the One who loves us most dearly.
A Hooker Named Gomer
And if those passages don’t get His point across, God has the prophet Hosea marry a hooker named Gomer (as if that’s not bad enough!). This is no OT version of “Pretty Woman.” She continues her career as a working girl and time after time her husband has to rescue her and bring her home.
Through these stories, God wants us to understand just how badly His heart breaks whenever we give our hearts away to anything less than Him. He created us in His image and for a relationship with Him.
Faithful Relationships
You may wonder what your relationship with Jesus has to do with your relationship with your spouse. Valid question. There is a powerful connection. When we’re faithful to God, there’s a pretty good chance we’ll be faithful to our marriage partner.
For more of God’s guidance on marriage and divorce, please check out Paul’s instructions to the church in Corinth (1Cor 7). The apostle tries to untangle a few of the problems that occur when the followers of Jesus wrestle with when it comes to their faith and their spouse.
A Review of God’s Glue
I don’t have to tell you that marriage problems are incredibly sticky. Pulling couples is messy and painful. That’s because of the bond God uses to fuse a husband and wife together is connects like nothing else.
A quick review of His glue…
- A husband “is joined to his wife” (v7 emphasis added).
- “The two are united into one” (v7 emphasis added).
- “They are no longer two but one” (v7 emphasis added).
- “Let no one split apart what God has joined together” (v7 emphasis added).
I’m sure Flex Glue is good stuff. Who wouldn’t want something that has “insta-grab” and can stick a brick to the ceiling? But it’s basically a little kid's glue stick compared the supernatural Super Glue of marriage.
©2019
Jay Jennings
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