“We interrupt this program to bring you this special report.” How many times have you been watching your favorite show or catching the big game when this happens? News breaks and the network or local station cuts in to bring you up to date. Here in verse 33, Paul breaks into his instructions to married men to bring us up to date on Jesus’ relationship with His church. “However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband” (v33). From his prison cell in Rome, the apostle applies his teaching about Jesus to Christian marriage. Meanwhile, back at the ranch.
We now return you to your regular program.
We get this idea from the very first word in this sentence: “However” (v33). In the original Greek text we see the conjunction plen. It means yet, in any case, nevertheless, rather or moreover. In other words, it’s a way of bringing things back to the original discussion. Consider the previous section kind of like an aside. A parenthetical comment. That’s NOT to say it’s not important. It’s a rabbit trail. A very important rabbit trail. A Holy Spirit inspired rabbit trail. But a rabbit trail nonetheless.
Most of Paul’s discussion about how husbands should treat their wives is actually about how the Perfect Husband treats His bride (Eph 5:25-32). Jesus lovingly sacrificed Himself for His church (Eph 5:25). He’s washing her perfectly in a Bible bath and getting her ready for the big day (Eph 5:26-27). He’s caring and pampering for His bride as her Hero and Protector (Eph 5:29). As followers of Jesus, we’re each intimately connected to Him and each other (Eph 5:30). And while no one knew it at the time, the first wedding in Eden was a picture of Christ’s marriage to His church (Eph 5:31-32). At this point, Paul returns us back to our regular program. After his discussion of Jesus and His bride, he gets back to his original point of how the husband and wife should relate.
We now return you to your regular program.
First, Paul addresses “each one of you” (v33). The “you” he’s talking to are the “husbands” back in verse 25. If you’re wondering which husbands need to follow this command, that would be “each one of you” (v33). Are you a married man who follows Jesus? OK, good. Listen up. Pay attention. Yeah, he’s talking to you. And me. He’s about to apply all of the stuff he just told us about Jesus’ relationship with His wife. Ready? Drum roll, please...
The husband is to “love his wife as himself” (v33). This is the fourth and final time the apostle tells us hard-headed hubbies to get busy and love our brides. First in verse 25. Twice in verse 28. Now one last time in verse 33. Love your wife, homey! Got it? Got it! Once again, Paul uses the Greek verb agapao, the kissin’ cousin to agape. This means to sacrificially show and prove one’s love to another, to love based on choice, will and action. It’s demonstrating an extreme high regard for someone by what is actually done. In Greek literature outside of the Bible, agapao means to treat with great affection and even to caress. This is a love that is so much more than a warm fuzzy that is never expressed. This love has legs. It gets going. This love has hands. This love does. It’s love in action. When someone is on the receiving end of agapao, they know it because something is done to them or for them.
Because a married couple has truly be joined together as one with God’s supernatural Super Glue, they are one intimate unit. You can’t pull them apart. It’s almost the opposite of when a single tiny cell splits in two during mitosis. When God gets involved in a marriage, two become one. 1+1=1. This isn’t a joint venture. Two actually become one. Because of this divine transformation, when a husband does things to express his love for his bride, he’s actually loving himself.
Now Paul turns back to all the married ladies. This is where this couples therapy began. Previously, the apostle tells wives to “submit to your own husbands” as an act of worship to Jesus (Eph 5:22). This is the idea of loving cooperation and willing obedience to the husband’s leadership. This does NOT mean she’s a doormat. This does NOT mean she’s a slave. This means she’s fully involved in the marriage, providing input to every key decision. Now in verse 33, the apostle gives us another thought on what that looks like. “Let the wife see that she respects her husband” (v33). The Amplified Bible does a fabulous job of giving us a 360 degree look at this idea. “Let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband [that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates, and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him, and loves and admires him exceedingly]” (v33 AMP). Read that again. Let that soak in.
The husband is to love. The wife is to respect. This isn’t just some random thought Paul had after being alone too long in slammer. Under the guidance of the God’s Spirit, he’s telling each spouse to give their partner what they need the most. God has wired the woman to need loving care. She needs to be cherished. She needs a hero. She needs a protector. That’s her husband. God has wired men to need to be held in high regard. He needs a cheerleader. He needs an encourager. That’s his wife. That’s the key idea behind Eggerich’s book “Love and Respect.” So as the apostle returns us to our regular program here, he sums it all up. Married men, show your bride love in action. Married women, respect and praise your man.
We now return you to your regular program.
Well, now it's your turn. What do you think? Do you agree? Disagree? I would love to hear what you think. Drop a comment below and let's chat.
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